


oh, and that's uncool space dad

by minazukihatta



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Green Lantern (Comics), Justice League - All Media Types, Superman - All Media Types, The Flash - All Media Types
Genre: HalBarry Fic Challenge, M/M, Possibly OOC, Sassy Sinestro, Smitten puppy Superman, The Justice League are Teenagers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-02
Updated: 2015-06-02
Packaged: 2018-04-02 12:07:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,599
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4059451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minazukihatta/pseuds/minazukihatta
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Justice League are a bunch of teenagers with a few of its members just over the age of eighteen. Clearly, age says nothing about maturity and hormones. </p><p>In which Hal may have a thing for his best friend Barry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	oh, and that's uncool space dad

**Author's Note:**

> I saw the HalBarry Fic Challenge on Tumblr and since this was sitting in my Fanfic Folder, I thought I would upload it. Please note this is un-beta-read. 
> 
> This is short, crappy and to be taken with a HUGE grain of salt.

Batman and Green Lantern were standing by the large floor-to-ceiling windows in the Watchtower that overlooked the Earth as it spun peacefully in place, when the latter posed the question:

“Hey Spooky, does Flash qualify as jailbait?”

Batman gave Green Lantern one of his sharp, piercing looks, y’know the one that translated ‘ _Why are you asking me this? Don’t you have better things to do? I certainly do.’_ Hal wondered if it was creepy that he read the Bat’s glares so easily, and with as much fluency as Supes. Then he was wondering if he was threatening the World’s Finest (B)Romance. The fan girls came up with the name.

 _“What?”_ Batman growled.

“Barry's fifteen, nearly sixteen, and I’m eighteen, nearly nineteen,” Hal elaborated. “So do you think he’s jailbait?”

The whites of Batman's cowl narrowed for a moment and then relented back to their normal shape. “I don’t think you should be as concerned with whether if Barry is jailbait or not as you be about Wonder Woman.”

Hal paled.

Wonder Woman did act like an over-protective sibling around the League’s youngest member. Emphasis on ‘over-protective’.

He had known Barry before and after he became the Flash. First time they met, it was during when Barry pretended be at some kind of nerd summer camp but really was investigating something weird and fishy at Coast City that turned out to be a bunch of deadly parasitic aliens mooching off of the humans living there. Hal messed up somewhere along the line of meeting him as Hal Jordan and Green Lantern that somehow Barry knew who he really was. It was frightening how a twelve-year-old was able to deduce his secret identity.

They have been really good friends since then. But Hal began noticing Barry … growing. His height shot up, but he didn’t dominate Hal’s 6’7, his shoulders grew broader, his voice deepened quite nicely and, well, he started to dye his brunet hair. As he grew, they both grew closer, so close that Hal preferred no-one else to have his back in battle and they could drop unannounced at each other’s places and still be cool about it.

Well … that time when Barry showed up when Hal was giving himself some … self-love was _sort of embarrassing_ , but not as awkward as the time as Hal walked in on Barry getting it on with some random guy from a school club. Hal frowned at the last memory. They got into a fight about that which resulted to a month long period where they both refused to acknowledge each other.

“And in case you were wondering, yes, he is ‘jailbait’,” Hal could hear the quotation marks coming from the condescending asshole—who by the way was two years younger than he was. “Mentally, I don’t he qualifies as jailbait. In our business, you grow up or you die.”

“Do you have to be so melodramatic, Spooky?”

“I’m not being melodramatic if it’s the truth, La—”

_“BROOOSSE!”_

Batman was honest-to-God _glomped_ halfway through his name, a pair of blue arms wrapping around the Dark Knight, lifting him up and spinning him around. Hal watched, bewildered, as the League’s older member act like a child to the League’s most mature member.

Superman’s Space Dad made a good decision to send him to a planet with a yellow sun twenty years ago because if Clark wasn’t indestructible, Hal was fairly sure Batman would have killed him by now.

“Clark, let go of me!” Batman growled.

Superman stopped spinning like a maniac and went on to smushing his face against Batman’s cheek, rubbing against it like a kitten, as well as hovering a few inches into the air. “But _Baby Bat_ , I wuv you,” he purred.

Oh God, Hal so wished he had his phone right now.

“Clark, put. Me. _Down_.”

“No!” The Kryptonian held the Bat closer. “I _wuv_ you and we’re soul-mates!”

“Clark—”

“Dude, he’s pouring his heart out to you!” Hal called out to them. “Don’t break his heart of steel! Oh, and don’t forget to send me the invitation to your funeral—I mean, wedding.”

Batman threw an ungrateful scowl to Hal before turning his attention to Superman. “Clark, what happened to—” Clark leaned down, pressing his lips down on Bruce’s. He pulled back up to beam at the gloomy teenager. “What—” Another peck on the lips. “Clark—” Kiss. “Stop—” Another one, longer this time and—

“Please don’t have sex in front of me,” Hal whimpered.

There was a _whoosh_ air and then Flash suddenly had his arms looped around Hal’s neck and his legs wrapped around his hips. “Hey, Hal,” Barry greeted him cheerily, with a friendly smile.

“Errrr … Hey, B,” Hal replied, shakily, “This is new.”

“Yeah.” Barry shrugged like it was no big deal to be hanging off a guy like a koala. Especially when the guy had a boner for him. Speaking of boners, he hoped he didn’t have one right now. Barry leaned back, tipping his head to peer at the World’s Finest Couple making out. Batman seemed to be reciprocating right now, drawing out little moans out of the Kryptonian. One of Superman’s hands wandered from Bruce’s back to one of the globes of his ass.

 _“Ewwwwww …”_ Barry and Hal cringed at the same time.

“What happened to Big Blue Boy Scout?” Hal inquired. “He’s not usually this … bold.”

Barry’s head went back to its original position. “There was witch in Metropolis, Diana and I was called in for back-up,” Barry explained. “She was big about love and hit Supes with a love-drunk spell.”

“Oh, really now?” said Batman, pulling away from Superman. The Kryptonian took the chance to nuzzle at his neck. “Clark, stop that.” More nuzzling. Bruce sighed. “How long— _Clark, I said stop_ —until it wears off?”

“In a few hours. In the meanwhile, take your PDA elsewhere. Preferably in your bedroom where Clark can good and properly molest you.”

Hal stared wide-eyed at Barry. He had never been so brazen before. He was usually quiet and polite, so adorable that nobody could get mad at him and had the most adorable pair of puppy eyes that _anybody_ —except for Batman—could give into anything he asked. His new bravado was actually kind of hot.

Really hot.

Batman huffed and murmured a few quiet words in Clark’s ear. They both shortly floated off after that. Okay, that just happened. Man, Justice League always got the weird crapola to deal with.

Hal placed his arms around the speedster’s waist so he could properly hold the younger boy up. “Barry, did you get hit with a spell by the witch?”

“Nope.” Barry shook his head. He pulled down his cowl to reveal the calm, serene expression on his face. “I just got a little bit of motivation from her. You know, for a villain, she’s actually quite wise.”

“Is she now?”

“Yeah, we talked about love and the difficulty and courage to say the words that came from our very hearts.” Barry snuggled closer to Hal, leaned his head on the crook of Hal’s shoulder and took in a deep breath. “Hal, _wouldyouliketogoonadatewithme?_ ”

Hal blinked. “What?”

“You. Me. Date. And, um, pizza,” Barry said. “Would you like to do that?”

Was this happening? Like, really happening? A voice that sounded annoyingly like Sinestro said _‘yes, you imbecile’_.

“I’d love to do that.”

Barry’s face lit up the moment he said that. “Really?”

“Re—”

 _“Harold Jordan, this is Sinestro, if I do not see you coming out to me outside of that playhouse of yours, I will tear that place piece by piece myself.”_ The alert came out of his ring like a bucket of cold ice water being poured onto some poor person unceremoniously.

“Thank you, asshole, for ruining that moment.” He sighed apologetically. “Sorry, B, gotta fly.”

Barry was unperturbed. “It’s all—”

_“I’m not seeing a little human boy flying out of that Watchtower.”_

Hal growled and brought his ring up to his mouth. “It’s because I’m not out yet! And I’m eighteen! I qualify as an adult on my world.”

There was a mocking scoff coming from the other end. _“Clearly, your world has low standards if they chose children to be adults—and to protect them.”_

“Dude, where are you anyway?”

“Oh, he’s right behind us,” Barry answered, pointing over Hal’s shoulder. Hal turned his head around to see the older Green Lantern glaring unimpressed at the two superheroes, arms crossed, on the other side of the viewing glass. “Is he your space dad?”

“More like an intergalactic pain in the ass.”

_“I heard that.”_

“Good.” Barry released his hold on the Green Lantern. “How about next Saturday at my place?”

“Only if you don’t blow me off,” Barry flirted.

“Then you better not be late.”

Barry took a hold of either side of Hal’s cheek and went in for a quick kiss. Fleeting. Short. And then he whizzed away in a blur of red.

Hal made his way outside to meet Sinestro.

The alien regarded him coolly. “I’m not going to be cleaning up your mess if you fly like a lunatic all the way back to Oa, Jordan.”

“Huh-uh,” Hal replied, goofily.

“I have no idea what that boy sees in you.”

“Probably the best.”

“Either that or you’re going to be a mistake he’ll look back on.”

“Hey!” Hal yelped, offended. “Why do you have such a low opinion of me?”

“Do you want me to start?”

“No.”

Sinestro flew past him, beginning the trip to Oa. “Come along, Jordan. We’ve got another drama to deal with.”

 

 

 


End file.
